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-- OR -- Mr. John Clay, whose blood runs a royal red, can also be seen in these previous issues of Electro-Graphic Monthly courtesy of her literary agent David McAllister: January
2004 . . . February
2004 . . . |
A
Pair of Letters Dear DLL, Sorry not to have written on Vampires, but they really don't affect me all that much. We entrepreneurs are a particularly materialistic lot. Oh, we have the odd Cornish Horror down at the Orphanage to scare the girls with, but that's about it. The only blood- sucking I deal with is the tradesmen. Now, that Mina Harker in that other League- the Extraordinary Gentlemen is it? Now there's a bit of alright. I am looking forward to viewing the cinematograph play about this Van Helsing chap. Perhaps the League can hold a viewing at the Clubhouse? J. Clay, Esq. ********* Thanks for the note, Frank. I appreciate your use of the honorific "Sir" Clay. As you are an American, I can understand that you probably meant to write "Sir John". Let me set you on the right path, socially speaking, for a second, as I see your heart is in the right place (unlike some Scotland Yard Jacks -in -Office I could name) . This would be correct if I had been knighted by the Queen (or King, as the case may be), like those Arthurs - Sullivan and Doyle (faintly Irish sounding chappies, what?). Or, it would be Sir J. Clay, Bt (or Bart.) if I were a hereditary Baronet (I might buy myself one of these someday). I don't insist upon it, but once my claim to descent from a certain Royal Duke (themselves illegitimate offspring of a certain Merry Monarch) is recognized by the College of Arms and Parliment ( I tell you I am practically camped out at Somerset House -and the fees- you Yanks were right to abolish peerages), I shall be addressed as Your Grace, ( I like the use of 'Mi'lord' in Paris, especiallment at the Moulin Rouge). But between us, I prefer 'Sir" and "Please" when being dressed in darbies (I wear rather different attire at The Derby, of course). Speaking of Paris, I was considering this business with a magic-lantern show at the DLL about Vampires. You know, those Froggies do have quite a number of the spritelier sort of show available. On behalf of the League, I would endeavor to secure some of the same for a "Stag Night" at the Club. When you come to think of it, whenever there is a new fangeled invention thinggy going on, it is the porno-graphic arts that really drive the development. Look at photography, look at cinema. The Melias brothers know how to mix a Jules Verne thriller with a pair of tights, I can tell you. I am sure that one day when people can have illustrated book pages sent to them over telegraph wires into a lighted receiving box in the comfort of their own libraries at home, there will be those who will readily supply us with such illuminations at the push of a button. For now, I am thinking of converting one of the barns down at the Orphanage into a studio for cinegraphic studies. I am thinking of retaining some of the folk from Roisey (I think its spelled) or Ironwood with some expertise in this sort of thing. Do you think that some of the DLL chaps might invest? A Mr. Milverton says he'll put up a bit, and I have a bite from a certain Baron G. who offers to underwrite what he calls a "Snuff flic" (I not sure, but I guess it must be some genre aimed especially for Gentlemens' Smokers audiences) starring an acquaintance of his, a Miss K. Winter, whose curious postal address is Hell, London. She's probably one of those Sarah Bernhart types - sleeping in a coffin, and all. Perhaps that's how we can make it a Vampire-themed production. I am told one can make a killing in this sort of entertainment. Your Friend, J.Clay, Esq. |
