A Quiz On Page 749

Two of the great minds of the Sherlockian world ran into each other this June at a scion meeting in San Francisco. One was Rosemary Michaud, winner of this column's first annual Dissecting Room Bowl. The second was William Ballew, winner of last year’s Dissecting Room Bowl. The conversation, of course, eventually took a turn in that direction, going something like this:

"You mean there is a prize for winning that thing?"

Yes, there is a prize, though until this year I never knew what it was going to be until after the competition appeared in these pages. This year, however, thanks to Bill Ballew's patience and chance encounter with Rosemary Michaud, the prize is even ready ahead of time.

What last year's winner eventually received, and what will be going out to this year's winner, is a Sherlockian rarity. A trophy that truly represents the spirit of this competition. A trophy that will adorn your shelves and forever call attention to your achievement. A trophy that could eventually wind up in a garage sale with some elderly matron asking you, "will you take a quarter?"

But there isn't a curse on it, I'm fairly certain of that.

What it is, you see, is a duck wearing a deerstalker cap. Around his neck is a medallion proclaiming "Top Dissection 1992," and near his feet is the mysterious inscription "Save Our Wet Lands."

The competition for this arcane object is going to be fierce, so I'm not pulling any punches this year. Turn to page 749 in your Doubleday Complete (or page 878 if you're George Scheetz, Mike Cook, or anyone else with the variant Complete. The passage, from Chapter Thirteen of HOUN, begins with Holmes saying "I think I shall be in a position . . ." and ends at the end of the paragraph that begins with Holmes saying "Dear me!" As always, this is an open book quiz.

The Third Annual Dissecting ROOM Bowl is about to begin.

1. Though it's been misspelled, what is the political party of the person by the big eater holding the aluminum foil?

2. Holmes's face is described as "clear-cut." How did he get those cuts?

3. Who has the canine jumper cables and what vehicle did he use for the jump?

4. Stapleton looked like Sir Hugo, but who looked like Mr. Whipple? (And two reasons for the resemblance.)

5. Give two pieces of evidence that Beryl Stapleton, while a beauty in Costa Rica, might have been less than attractive.

6. My dissection reveals six references to Shakespeare's plays in the text. How many do you find?

7. Who would have kept Holmes from solving the Zuzu Petals case, if held been around to work on it instead of a latter-day rock and roll detective?

8. Which line sounds like George Bush hoping for re-election?

Okay, that's as close as I can come to being John Bennett Shaw for this year. This particular mix of bad puns and obscure references is guaranteed to stop anyone from getting one hundred percent (and if you do get every one of those right, remember to fill the car up with gas before you bring it home, because you must be one of my multiple personalities trying to carry on as if you had a life of your own). The person who isn't me whose answers are closest to my own shall be declared the winner and awarded the fabulous Dissecting Room duck award.

For those of you with good memories: The Merryweather Memorial Whist Tournament is still looking for challengers after a year's wait. If no one else turns up, the Burr and Keefauver team will just have to beat the stuffing out of the Pondicherry Lodge and declare ourselves the Intercontinental Sherlockian Whist Champions. And we'll be very obnoxious about it, too.

(This column appeared in the October 1992 issue of Plugs & Dottles.)