Holmesomania

By Ron Kritter
(who can be seen moderating the"WelcomeHolmes" list
at http://groups.yahoo.com/group/WelcomeHolmes/ )

In and on the news recently were reports that the disappearance in 1930 of New York's Judge Joseph Force Crater may soon be solved. A history of the case in the August 20th edition of The New York Times noted that his disappearance gave rise to an expression at the time used to describe those who suffer a similar fate: "pulling a Crater".

You may have read about this classic crime case, but if you did, and are subject to fits of Holmesomania, it was not the picture of Judge Crater (Isn't 'Force' a great middle name, by the way?) but instead the name of James Phillimore mentioned by Dr. Watson at the beginning of "The Problem of Thor Bridge" that popped into your mind. James, too, "pulled a Crater".

According to the new Diagnostic and Statistical Manual (DSM-V) which is now in prepublication preparation, a late-stage and serious symptom (stage 4) of the disorder *Holmesomania* is making immediate canonical connections when reading news stories.

Do you self examine for this final stage in Holmesomania? It's recommended by health professionals in many nations and three separate continents -- even if you are convinced that you are not genetically predisposed to the condition.

Asking simple questions of yourself has been put forward as a tried and true method for self examination. Some examples are below.

When you read about the current military and political struggles in Afghanistan does the statement "You have been in Afghanistan, I perceive" pop instantly into mind?

When you look at the sports page and see the stories about baseball players abusing steroids do you wonder what the batting average of a New York Yankee hitter would be if he were on the powerful Langur serum?

When you see a news photograph of the Pope on his trip to Germany do you find yourself suddenly reflecting on the sudden mysterious death of Cardinal Tosca?

If so, friends, you, too, may be a victim of this commonly reported condition for once the mind is infected the spread is rapid, the spread throughout the geography of the brain complete.

Take some time today as you browse the newspapers to check your own responses, but remember: Holmesomania is a controversial and disputed diagnosis -- many doctors deny that it even is a disease and assure us that it is only a pleasant state of mind.